What is Verbal Abuse?Verbal abuse, also known as reviling, is a type of abusive behavior using language. Now, before I go into talking about verbal abuse, I want everyone to know the signs of verbal abuse caused by the abuser.
- Actions of ignoring, ridiculing, disrespecting, and criticizing others consistently.
- A manipulation of words.
- Purposeful humiliation of others.
- Accusing others falsely for the purpose of manipulating a person's decision making.
- Manipulating people to submit to undesirable behavior.
- Making others feel unwanted and unloved.
- Threatening to leave the family destitute.
- Placing the blame and cause of the abuse onto others.
- Isolating a person from some type of support system, consisting of friends or family.
In order to know you are being Verbally abused, you need to know what a healthy relationship is and what you want. The abuser wants to be in control, if he/she does not like the way you are, they will convince you through anger to change that. This is why females are verbally abused so easily. Most people will say females get more attached then males, but we will not argue if this is true or not. This will be solely an example. If a female falls for a male, and he constantly tells her she is ugly and fat, the female will try to change her apperance for him. Now, we know it would be easier to walk away, but when you are attached to someone that is not easy to do. Most of the time the male is the abuser, but there are cases where the female is the abuser.
If your partner can not respect, love, and care for you for the person you are, then there is a good chance you will receive verbal abuse. The healing process can be very hard. First, you really need to recognize that you are being abused. You need to confront the abuser, and right away you will be hit with denial. The abuser always denies what he/she is doing, and will say something along the lines of "What is your problem". They still want to show control, and their goal is to make you feel bad and wrong. If you can get past that, you are more then on the right track for your healing process.
The abuser, usually becomes abusive because he/she has been abused in the past. You need to get into their head, and figure out why they do it. The main reason most of the time is because they have been abused, and then become the abuser to learn to deal with it, by doing it themselves.
Watch what you say to the people that mean most to you. Words, are the most hurtful weapon. Verbal abuse, tends to lead to physical, emotional, and even sexual abuse.
"The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." (Psalm 34:18)
This is completly true, the signs you talk about are to the exact detail. Verbal Abuse is one of the worse because it can bring your self-esteam down so badly that it can be almost impossible to bring it up. we really got to find ways to stop this.
ReplyDeleteScott, your post is very interesting to outsiders unfamiliar with the effects of verbal abuse. I agree that verbal abuse is one of the more effective forms of abuse because it demoralizes someone for who they really are and even makes them out to be someone who they aren’t. It was interesting to read in your post that most common verbal abuse cases are from a man to his wife or girlfriend. For women or girls to just even over hear a conversation about them and listen to them being fun of by people they barely even know is disheartening and can lead to low self-esteem. It was also interesting to read about how it is very common for abusers to have been abused in their past. This is disturbing in the sense that they have the audacity to abuse others when they went through most of their lives being abused themselves. Overall I agree with everything you have posted and I think that this post will help others become well aware of the effects and signs of verbal abuse.
ReplyDeleteScott, your post was very informative and really described what verbal abuse can really do to a person. It's interesting to learn about verbal abuse because most of the time, when people think of abuse, they tend to just think of PHYSICAL abuse. it's important to acknowledge verbal abuse and all other types of abuse, because as you said in your post, words can be the most hurtful weapon.
ReplyDelete- Justine A.
I have to admit that I learned many things about verbal abuse from this blog. Many people feel that they are well informed about the signs and causes of verbal abuse, but I tend to disagree. This blog also expresses the reality of the issue at hand. There are many individuals (whether it be in a romantic relationship or friendly relationship) that experience the horrific effects of verbal abuse. This type of abuse, like many others, has changed the lives of many people. It is time for people to become more aware about the signs of a abuse and put it to an end.
ReplyDeleteIt is SO crazy how so many people go through this and more than half the time no one says anything about it. Believe it or not you may be going through this abuse everyday and you might not even realize it, through relationships and even at public interactions with others. Many may say, yeah ok I'm fine don't worry, when really deep inside they are hurting because what others have said to them or about them. Verbal abuse is like a disease, it grows and spreads to many people. This makes our job of stoping this kind of abuse more difficult.
ReplyDeleteAwesome post. Your insight is wonderful.
ReplyDeleteScott:
ReplyDeleteYou did a good job making readers aware of what constitutes verbal abuse. From a teacher's perspective, I can say I see it all the time. Most kids aren't even aware of the psychological damage they are causing others sadly. Others are aware of it and don't seem to care. My own psychological perspective is that one "verbally abuses" to gain a sense of control that they lack in other areas of their life.
Overall, good post. Keep up the good work.
-Mel